Randon Entries:

and here comes a long entry provided by yourstruly.
TIME: 7:07 p.m.

DATE: Sunday, Nov. 09, 2003



I am feeling: <


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TODAY'S HEADLINES, HILARIOUS JUNK, AND SIDE STORIES

I am back. Five days without me is me without diaryland and that is not good. For me.........I don't think it was the other way around but me without diaryland stinks......I had to take some breathers and thought about what I said last time and how I felt. I did felt miserable and it show. And I just couldn't put words into about why I felt the way I did.

The next day, I receive a %%diary-Summer Gale%%. She always knows what to say. She has been through a lot but still is one of the nicest and sweetest people at this diaryland. NO pun there. She really is and it was nice and comforting and I appreciate the hugs that she send to me. I didn't need to make sense to still have people to reach out. It is nice. Really nice.

And then I receive a thoughtful note from wherwhenwhy. Her note really made sense. First, she understood what I was going through. hmm Anybody else understand and did go through what I am going through, now that is a miracle. Second, she did point out there must be some stress and third: was a great point about watching yourself and being down on yourself

and lastly, a great point, maybe take a little time off and just have a little vacation or a holiday...Hmmm

So I did just that I took the two days after to just not think or just relax and then it came to me what was bothering me.

The first thing I thought about was work and about the situation that I posted awhile ago. I didn't wanted to go into details but the big concern that time was and it happens to anybody but there is a thing called office sexual harrassment. If you want to read it. I heard from a good source of mine that this person was very jealous of me (And I don't know why) and that she wanted to get me into trouble and this is one way to really do that.

That really bother me.

And then I am getting a lot of stress from my class. I have this only class left but finding the time is harder then I image. It is hard to work and read at the same time...SO I am having the stress of that.

And then work in itself is hard. I try to help with stranger's sitation and it is hard. There are some that just so heartbreaking and it is just so hard to listen to them.

And lastely I have been around many negative people lately. I brought in a jigsaw puzzle because it has been going down slow and I just figure by now I am not reading my homework anymore at work. So I brought it in. My tribal council leader didn't say anything about it since I am doing in between my customers but the lady next to me first words out of her mouth were probably you can't have it after one week. Or she would say something that was so negative and I didn't think it would affect me but it does. And we are having new people around me and that is a change. And this weather is getting my sinus trouble all the time. Until my body get used to this, it is crazy. And then I come home and have my stepmom being all negative. I know I am not the ideal short person around but somehow having pamplets of losing weight and how she complains about me just is not cutting it with me. She says later that she is concern. I am concern myself but I just don't need to wake up everyday with a phamplet of what society thinks that all people should be. I get that when I get out of the house.

And I thought about all these little things and they are making my stress. NO wonder I just want to be by myself. The only time I really enjoy is going to my church and being with people that don't care how I look and just being around them is nice enough.

Then I remember a great person told me many times. This great person is my sister, Jenifer. She ask me why do I let them control the way I feel. You can't change them, you need to change the way you react to them.........And the way you are going to let them affect you. Instead of being defensive, take the offensive and go for it......

Good point......So Friday, I did and it made a huge difference. It is not like my stress went away so fast. I still have to find time with my school work and I still have work but I am walking a little different and I am not letting people change the way I think......This weekend I feel a little weight was off of me as I realize that I need to listen to Jenny more and I need to realize that....And plus work on stuff that I enjoy more like jigsaw puzzles and also work on my diary..(new pictures) and have myself a little vacation every now and then. And get back to work........Now that is a concept....

Take a Step Backwards - Go ON Forward

2 Any cool comments about this wacky entry!



Picture, Quote, JOke, or crazy thing for today:




Backup Five Steps

I will be here tomorrow - Wednesday, Feb. 09, 2005

Gosh I think I am able to breath - Wednesday, Nov. 10, 2004

That is my relative, ziggy - Monday, Nov. 01, 2004

no bright eyes but always bushy tail - Thursday, Oct. 28, 2004

litte update from me.... - Wednesday, Oct. 27, 2004

Other Diaryrings are below!!!
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Diaryrings: ME
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